UGLY HABITS THAT KILL YOUR VIBE | PROBLEMS AND SOLUTIONS
Habits die hard. Well, the problem is even bigger than it seems at first sight. The fact is that to kill or replace a habit, the first step is to identify that you do that particular thing out of habit and many of us prudent men refuse to acknowledge that. Even if some of us do acknowledge them we are reluctant to change because these habits seem harmless.
What is the problem then?
The problem is that these habits make you look bad. They may not harm you physically but they definitely contribute towards the impression that you make in front of others. In fact, some habits are so depressingly ugly that they definitely kill any positive energy around you. But the good news is that after all, they are just habits. If you can pick these up, you can surely drop them off and become a better individual. In this article, we will talk about the worst of the worse habits that all men should avoid at all costs. In addition to enlisting these problems, we shall also suggest some solutions to help you get over them.
NOT SHOWING UP ON TIME
The biggest enemy of any perfectly planned event is bad timing. The thing with time is that you cannot adjust it to suit your needs. You need to adjust to it and follow it. Of course, you can always plan ahead but once you have planned and committed, there is no going back. Well, what is wrong in being a few minutes late? No big deal, right? Well, yeah it is a pretty big deal. The thing is that making someone wait will form an impression of you even before you meet that person and a poor one.
You get the problem. Now, how do you overcome it? The answer is discipline. But that is a tough one. So, to begin with, just start by scheduling your reminders a few minutes early. Do not plan your schedule without buffers. If you reach early, no harm done. Don’t be late!
SHABBY BODY LANGUAGE
Well firstly, you do not need to be an expert in knowing what posture means what to know how you should be presenting yourselves in public. If you know the postures, great. If you don’t, no issues. Just avoid things that suggest you do not want to interact with people and things that suggest that you are too desperate.
Some pointers would be :
- Avoid putting hands in your pockets and crossing your arms over your chest.
- Avoid flexing your muscles in public(it looks really desperate).
- Do not point towards strangers.
- Do not be excessively stiff or excessively relaxed, both look bad.
- Practice a firm handshake.
Even though most of the things mentioned above just require a conscious effort, there are a few things you can do to avoid the poor body language. If you feel uncomfortable putting your hands out of your pockets, try holding something. Instead of pointing towards strangers, use verbal methods to locate something(maybe use the clock notation). When shaking hands, just reciprocate the enthusiasm and energy that the other person is showing. But if you are a senior in rank/work hierarchy, start with a firm handshake.
Remember that a good body language exudes confidence and stronger emotions. This is something you should definitely work upon.
A lot of people do not even think about oral hygiene and grooming as habits and that is why poor oral hygiene and grooming is often a norm among youngsters and people with very busy schedules. For them, it isn’t even necessary for it eats up precious time. Well gentleman let me ask you a simple question, Do you remember a single day which was fruitful and you got work done by people without showing your face? Well agreed that some of us are immensely smart and we get our work done from behind the screen but there is a world beyond that and in that world, you do not want to greet people with bits of food over your teeth or patches of unwanted hair on your cheeks or turn them away by your foul breath and that is exactly why grooming and oral hygiene are very important.
To get grooming and good oral hygiene to become a part of your habits:
- Make it a point to brush once every 12 hours and use proper brushing techniques.
- After brushing and rinsing your toothbrush, cover your brush so that bacteria does not accumulate over it. Change your toothbrush once every 3 months.
- Floss and clean your tongue at least once a day.
- Visit your dentist at least once every six months.
- Keep your facial hair tidy. If you shave, do so regularly(at regular intervals).
- Moisturise your face, hands and feet daily. Drink lots of water to avoid chappy lips.
- Wear clean socks and undergarments(if that was not already understood).
- Use subtle fragrances, not the once that are harsh on the nose.
EXCESSIVE USE OF CRUTCH WORDS TO FILL IN FOR POOR COMMUNICATION
Crutch words are words that you slip into your sentences to buy you more time to think. These words do not add any meaning to the sentence, they just make the sentence longer and anybody who is listening intently is bound to make out that either you are extremely nervous, bluffing or outright lying. The thing with crutch words is that over time they become unconscious verbal tics. they seep into your language and become a part of it. You would notice a lot of experts in their fields relying on crutches to support their conversation. This more often than not is because the crutches have somehow managed to get into our habits and simple normal conversations.
Why are they a problem, you would ask. It is because they weaken the point you are trying to make. I will give you an example, “I am good!” sounds so much more confident and convincing than ” Umm.., I am good, I guess!”. This makes the point clear enough. Stop using these and work on your conversation and interpersonal skills. Invest your time and money in learning how to present yourselves in front of other people because it matters.
NOT KNOWING HOW TO GREET
Greeting people is an awkward moment for many of us. For some of us, it is because we are introverts, for others maybe because we are not sure of their response and for the rest many just because we do not know how to greet people. Agreed that greetings are tricky but they are the first impression that you make in front of anybody and rest assured that if you make a great impression or a very bad one, they will remember it for a very long time.
Pulling off a great greeting involves several factors including but not limited to an initiative, smile, a firm handshake(not so strong that it crushes the other person’s hand) and a confident voice. The safe way to do it is, to look the person in the eye, smile, offer your name, stick out your hand for a handshake and proceed from there. If the person mentions their name, make it a point to remember it and use it in your conversation as appropriate.
Habits are difficult to overcome but so is a loss of face. It is difficult to make a reputation and a good career and you do not want to ruin it with some silly habits that you could have overcome. Take it one day at a time and do not lose sight of your ultimate goal and you will ace it. Hustle hard and stay motivated!
Until Next time!