BETTER MAN PROJECT: VOLUME 1: OUTLOOK TOWARDS LIFE
A man’s life is full of surprises. You never know what you will have to face tomorrow. No matter how good you are, you will never be prepared for everything. You will never be perfect. However, this fact that there is always room for improvement makes it possible for all of us to be better men.
The Better Man Project is an attempt to encourage men across the globe to identify their weaknesses and shortcomings and strive to achieve perfection in whatever they do. This series is divided into 4 volumes that deal with four extremely important facets of a man’s life.
- Outlook towards Life.
- The approach towards Intra-personal Interactions.
- The approach towards Inter-personal Interactions.
- Outlook towards Professional Interactions.
This being the first volume of the four will cover the aspects of a man’s life that require reflection and some thought. The key, of course, is to identify what needs to be changed and nobody can do that better than yourselves. Identify what is important to your life and whether making amends to it will make you a better man. The following article will run you through some great places to start.
1. ACCEPT THAT LIFE IS NOT A BED OF ROSES
As a gentleman, you should know that your life is governed by the choices you make. Understand and accept that life may or may not be fair to you, but this must not hinder you from doing what needs to be done and creating your own future. Do not let circumstances rule you. Take charge and do not make excuses. Remember that all great things take time and effort and you shall not falter. The toil of today will pay dividends tomorrow and believe us, it will be worth it.
2. BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE
You may not always like the way things are, but understand that the barrier between you and your dreams is more psychological and less physical. Do not blame others for your failures, instead, change what you did wrong and start afresh with renewed vigour. Learn to adapt to hardships without compromising on your moral fortitude.
3. FACE YOUR FEARS
A gentleman’s life is a result of his decisions and not his circumstances. Instead of sitting on the sidelines and letting your fears control you, get out there and face them. I am not saying it will be easy, but it is necessary. Your fear and anxiety will only keep you from doing things you want to do. The best way to do this is by learning the art of taking the next step.
4. LEARN TO SAY NO
Being a gentleman does not mean you have to oblige to every request that comes your way. If you decline a request, it doesn’t mean that you are selfish or uncaring. It simply means you have your priorities and personal boundaries that you respect. Remember that it is not wrong to say no, but you should do so politely. Interestingly you will notice a boost in self-confidence as you start practising this. Work on avoiding guilt after saying no.
5. TRUST YOUR GUT
When you trust your inner intuition, you are trusting the subconscious collection of your experiences and knowledge. I am not saying be reckless and do whatever comes to your mind but do not ignore the subconscious tug. Whenever making a decision weigh the information and then decide. Practice mindfulness and you will understand that your gut tells you things that your mind cannot comprehend.
6. PRIORITISE YOUR WORK
Prioritising is not just about identifying what is more important and what is less. It is essentially about managing your tasks in the most efficient order. Prioritising makes your life a bit simpler by decluttering the enormous workload you may have. Identifying the order of priority is the only thing you should worry about when practising this. The correct way to do this is to start with grouping things together. Club the tasks of one domain and then deal with one domain at a time.
7. DISCIPLINE YOUR LIFE
Easier said than done. This is probably the toughest thing on the list but is totally worth every bead of sweat you put into it. Discipline demands routine and a strong resolve to abide by that routine. Start off by understanding what discipline means to you and try to achieve it. You will be surprised to see the changes in your life as things start falling into place. Make a resolve and start following it. Let’s say, for example, you want to start working out, Do it. There will be times when you would want to give up midway. When such a time comes, remember why you started and hold on to your resolve and the day you are able to do it, congratulate yourself, for you have become a disciplined man.
8. PLAY TO WIN
You cannot win until you want to win. When you take up a challenge or start off with some new venture, just give it all you have got. While there is nothing wrong with losing, it should not become a habit. And the only way to ensure it is striving for success. Do not take up things you are not sure about. The time to decide whether you want to play a game or not is before you start playing it. Play to win and you will win.
9. STAY MOTIVATED
A motivated man can achieve what he aspires. You should find ways to fuel your motivation. For some of us, just listening to motivation might do the trick, some others may be driven by example and there are many who will be motivated by the fear of failure. Find your motivation and hold on to it. It is the light that will guide you through the tougher days.
10. UNDERSTAND THE BALANCE BETWEEN MONEY AND LIFE
Your life is what you make of it. You can either spend it in pursuit of money. In contrast, you can also spend your money in pursuit of a lavish life or you can find the sweet spot between the two, the balance between money and life. Learn to manage your money. Do not buy stuff you cannot afford and at the same time do not feel guilty for spending on stuff you can afford. Focus less on what you do with your money and more on why you do it. Spending carelessly is unacceptable and so is being a skinflint.
This list was just to give you an idea and what you should work upon for starters. In the upcoming posts, we will hopefully talk about all these things in detail and clear the air of confusion that you might have. Alternatively, feel free to explore them on your own. Until next time!